Georgia Takes Reopening Too Far, Accidentally Building 20 New Denny’s Restaurants
“At first we just meant to just play around with wood and tools since we hadn’t been outside for a while, and...
Face Mask Prevents Courtesy Smile, Man Takes A Stand
The Courtesy Smile is an evil, whose swift ubiquitous destruction would bring about public rejoice, 30-day cruise ship festivals, and worldwide cease-fires....
Bill Gates Comes Clean About Scandalous Affair with Jeff Bezos
Though Bill and Melinda Gates only announced their divorce this month, it seems that this decision was not as sudden as the...
Strapped for Cash, UCSC Initiates Giving Day Stage 2: Taking Day
By all measures, Giving Day 2020 was a rousing success. That is, all measurements except those of the UC Santa Cruz Administration,...
New Research Shows Plastic Bag to Be Most Effective Face Mask Material, Blocking 100...
Following months of gruelling research at the national institute for advanced mouth studies, top mouth scientists have found that a simple plastic...