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Copyright Infringement Hornets discovered in Santa Cruz

The discovery of a newly-invasive species of insect, dubbed the Copyright Infringement Hornet, is causing quite the buzz around Santa Cruz County....

Local Literary Magazine Bombarded With Hundreds Of “Pieces” Titled “Love In The Time Of Corona”

Name a catastrophe and I’ll tell you about a group of people who tried to exploit it for personal gain. It is,...

Landlord Won’t Stop Talking About the Musical “Rent”

It’s confirmed: Alicia Topin of Gilroy California has the worst landlord ever. While the owner of the complex that Alicia lives in,...

The 10 Best Ways to End Your Essay

Once again, final papers season is upon us. Writing a 10 page essay about post- Brutalist architecture is easy enough, but how...

Georgia Takes Reopening Too Far, Accidentally Building 20 New Denny’s Restaurants

“At first we just meant to just play around with wood and tools since we hadn’t been outside for a while, and...

Charlie Sheen Has Vietnam Scene Flashback

Recently, actor Charlie Sheen who has described his attitude towards life and his HIV diagnosis as positive, revealed in an interview that shooting the film Platoon by auteur Oliver Stone, who is currently writing a chilling, conspiratorial expose about that one time the mailman gave him a different Mr. Stone’s mail, that the filming of Platoon was one of the worst experiences of his life. Newly reformed Mr. Sheen who now paints impressionist watercolors in his Philadelphia townhouse spoke to us recently. “That experience was horrible. When I was in Vietnam, well, technically we...

Manager Review – Ted Klipner, By Adam Sandler

Hello my adoring fans, its ME, adam stanler, probalby better known by the ladies as the SEXIST man alive. I would review a movie but piece of shit disease still deciding to ruin my career. Let me cut to the cake. I recieved bunch of letters from my sheeple fans after I EXPOSED my manager name of ted klipner for being a DINK, but aparently that didnt satisfy you people. You want me to tear him to smithereens, do you? You want me to throw him in the dumpster and spit? TOUGH SHIT dingus, I’m not gonna...

Face Mask Prevents Courtesy Smile, Man Takes A Stand

The Courtesy Smile is an evil, whose swift ubiquitous destruction would bring about public rejoice, 30-day cruise ship festivals, and worldwide cease-fires....

How I am Staying Safe and Sane: A Coronavirus Essay by Shirley Wassan

It’s been hard finding that human connection during this time, as a responsible citizen I am socially distancing but lately I’ve been...

Disease Review – Coronavirus, By Adam Sandler

Dears reader, It’s me, adams sandler (you might remember me as handsome hunk #3 in your childhood dreams). Today...

Apple Genius Bar Worker Exorcises Steve Jobs’ Ghost from Broken MacBook

Deep in the cavernous crystal palace that is the Apple Store in the Stonestown Mall, aplace wandering travellers describe as shrouded in...

FRL Investigates: Has the Mailman Always Been Hot?

The debate is ongoing, and tensions are high.The residents of a certain two-story house in downtown Santa Cruz have come to an...

After Traumatic Desert Island Experience Man Sees All People As Legs of Mutton

After being trapped on a remote South Pacific island unknown to humanity except for allof the people that used to live there...

Fun and Easy Quarantine Crafts!

1. Diet Friend  Is your trash just piling up by your bedside? Slap on...

Opinion: The Do-Re-Mi Song: Hot Garbage

The Sound of Music is a movie which I have not seen, based on a play which I have not seen, and...