Due to the tragic state of the global economy, with the exception of a handful of billionaires, the world is in desperate need of a stimulus to get consumers to invest in the market again. I predict that this commodity will be none other than Silly Bandz, the leading arm accessory and form of currency in the 2010s.
Socially acceptable cosplay
Cosplayers, new and old, have returned to take their rightful place on the center stage of TikTok, formerly known as Musically: an untamed utopia for cosplayers. As the first openly-weeaboo celebrities come out, such as the Rock and Megan Thee Stallion, many fashionistas will follow suit in wearing fursuits to work, and long-time cosplayers may express themselves fully outside of comic-con.
We all know that the British accent is naturally charming, but the most stylish Londoners are not the posh inbred socialites, but those bold little kids heading to their jobs in the factories. Orphan-chic makes you appear humble, quirky, and immune to lead poisoning. Capture your inner-street urchin by bringing out your best cockney accent to ask for a bowl of porridge in your rugged newsboy hat.
Chunky Grandma Jewelry
What is considered vintage updates every era, and the bulky bobble necklaces of the 80s will soon enter that area of antique and youthful nostalgia. I predict that soon, teens will start reincorporating the funky, geometric jewelry into their outfits– that is, if their puny necks can withstand the weight.
The poison ring, or pillbox ring, was popular in the 15th century for being a stylish way of slipping poison into your enemy’s drink. These went out of fashion for some time when people realized it isn’t polite to kill people over brunch, but women have yet to conquer their greatest enemies: their ungrateful, cheating husbands. So if you see your Aunt Carol flaunting one of these gemmed beauties instead of her wedding ring, you’ll know why! If you don’t yet have someone in need of poisoning, these classy pieces could also function as a portable nonlethal drink like vodka or a caramel macchiato.
With rates of homosexuality at an all-time high, we predict that the few heterosexual designers left in the industry will push for government-mandated straight-cut jean policy to curb the rising numbers. Anyone seen cuffing or adding patches to their jeans will be detained and sent to the nearest Bass Pro Shop.
Gen Z designers have changed industry standards in ethical consumption/production by reducing the insane amount of textile waste in landfills. They are solving this issue by renewing old donated clothes and other modern clothing companies are doing the same. However, just because the products help the environment, doesn’t mean they’ll be affordable, attractive, or size-inclusive.
After the success of the new Bridgeton series, as well as the many adaptations of Jane Austen books, fans will surely look to empire waist-line dresses and clothing to replicate Regency-era fashion. This high waist, accompanied by corsets and tasteful jewelry, accentuates the breasts while hiding all the weight gained over quarantine.
This is a trend that never goes out of style! Year after year, you can expect white people to uphold their favorite tradition: stealing other people’s shit.
After the fall of chunky sneakers in 2020, hypebeasts and other streetwear sneakerheads will be looking for an equally trendy modified shoe that will give them both comfort and clout. Whether you’re in sports mode or relaxed mode, platform crocs will meet these criteria with flying colors, especially if paired with some cute shoe charms!