Hello, obnoxious film students and people with a cultish reverence for Disney who give everything five stars, at Letterboxd we’ve heard your complaints that our open ended review format allows too much critical thinking and not enough room for played-out one line joke reviews and GIFs, so we’ve introduced pre-written reviews with pre-conceived opinions about a number of popular films so you can sound like a certified cinephile without having to actually spend time watching movies.
Feel free to copy any of these reviews into your profile for instant film clout and internet adoration.
Iron Man 9 ★★★★ I like how the witty banter doesn’t interfere with the touching emotional moments like when you saw a single tear form around the eye-hole of Iron Man’s mask because some magic purple man died. Who says these movies are just soulless corporate garbage?
Rashomon ★★ Stupid Akira Kurosawa just accidentally made the same movie four times, what a dingus.
Taxi Driver ★ Something something, toxic behavior, something something, too much violence, oops, my brain fell out of my head.
Joker ★★★★★ or ★ I have not seen this movie and I think it’s (an amazing piece of art that only true big brained geniuses will understand / a horrible reflection of society) and I think everyone who sees it should be given (a medal / herpes).
Brokeback Mountain ★★★★ I might be an analytical genius because I’ve uncovered some very subtle gay undertones in this movie.
Letterboxd is also proud to announce a new fact-checking feature for reviews so you can immediately cut through the bullshit.
From a user review of Ben-Hur ★★★★
“I’ve seen this movie dozens of times FACT CHECK False, you have barely seen this movie one time and it’s still one of my favorites. Even though it clocks in at four hours no part of it is boring FACT CHECK False, you were scanning Craigslist for a new futon through about 60% of the film’s runtime and Charlton Heston is an amazing actor! FACT CHECK No he’s not