In A Radical Move, Trader Joe’s Endorses Joe Biden


 In a historic move, popular grocery store chain Trader Joe’s changes its name to Trader Joe Biden in anticipation of the upcoming presidential election. Trader Joe Biden is the first large grocery chain to make an official presidential endorsement. “Simply groundbreaking!” exclaimed Joseph T.  Rader Jr. (heir to the Trader Joe’s empire), “since the dawn of time a grocery chain had never lent its support to a presidential candidate, we just stuck to issues like paper or plastic and whether it was chill to label a product ‘Trader Ming’s Kung Pao Chicken’ Therefore, I’m stoked we could provide a dose of funky, charming vibe check to the political discourse.” It is unclear whether fellow grocery chains will chime in with their own endorsements, though rumors are swirling about Wynn Dixie’s allegiance to Evangelical groups and the company’s noted silence on controversial political issues…