The Santa Cruz Police Department issued a warning to cut up all candy received from strangers this Halloween for fear of hidden eggs. “Although razor blades in chocolate bars are definitely an urban legend, eggs aren’t! Stay safe this Halloween by cutting up all candy.”
The Chief of Police first became aware of this very real problem when his sister-in-law came over for a hearty dinner of kombucha and brown rice. She said that last year her daughter’s harmonica instructor’s son found an entire hardboiled egg inside of a Fun Size Snickers that he collected while trick-or-treating. After launching an eggspansive investigation, the SCPD gathered dozens of reports of similar experiences from last Halloween. Cases included Blow Pops with boiled egg yolk instead of gum, Crunch bars made with egg shells, and what amassed to be about a quarter cup of scrambled egg underneath the hard chocolate coating of a bag of M&Ms.
The SCPD insisted that the detectives on this case are grade A, yet they still have no suspects. Santa Cruz parents are becoming increasingly worried as the holiday approaches. At last week’s council meeting, local father Ethan G.G. White lamented, “It has been nearly a year since my 9-year-old almost choked to death on the freeze-dried egg white he mistook for a marshmallow. If they don’t have any leads now, I’m not reashirred this Halloween will be safe.” His son Benedict added on, “Eggs are yucky.”
Nonetheless, the public is encouraged to play it safe until this case is cracked.