Drake Voted Best Musical Artist By People in the Fetal Position


According to recently released musical rankings by the Billboard Top 100, Drake was the favorite musical artist of people curled in the fetal position in 2019. Drake edged out last year’s winner Lana Del Rey on the strength of hits like “In My Feelings” and “I’ve Been Crying for 3 Days Because I Love Women”. 

Drake took to Twitter to thank his fans and address displacing Lana in the number one spot. “I’m so grateful to have been blessed with such loyal fans,” Drake wrote. “And crying I took Lana’s spot. I’m legit in the fetal position rn, im so sry Lana ilu”. According to Drake’s manager Bob Thornton, Drake was conveniently already in the fetal position from writing his sequel track “I’ve Been Crying All Year Because I Love Women”. Despite Drake’s trepidations, we can think of no one more deserving of this prestigious honor.