Landlord Won’t Stop Talking About the Musical “Rent”


It’s confirmed: Alicia Topin of Gilroy California has the worst landlord ever. While the owner of the complex that Alicia lives in, the Oceanview-Plainview-Canyonview-Downtown Towers, has long been listed as among the smelliest and most greedy land owners in the United States, recent developments have sent Georgios Himpopuman to the top of the official Landlord Bastard List.

Will this rise in ranking even land Himpopuman the coveted cover picture of Slumlord Monthly? We think he has a strong shot based on the absolutely innovative way he has begun harassing his tenants. Oh, you haven’t heard? Every single month Himpopuman will talk to his tenants about the musical “Rent” for an hour nonstop.

Alicia fucking hates it. She never knows whether he’s asking for the month’s rent check a day early or whether he is legitimately interested in knowing where a current production of the 1996 musical is. Is he threatening to evict Alicia because she won’t pay a year’s rent in advance or is he just trying to make a point about how the musical is very insincere? It’s truly amazing how creative landlords are with finding new ways to annoy their tenants, it’s like they went to art school and loved it and then used their creativity to be an asshole.

For now we can only hope that Himpopuman doesn’t take inspiration for the price of rent from the song that has the number of seconds in the year.